All Natural Mommies

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Do you strive to be the “perfect parent”? Can I ask you, what exactly IS the “perfect parent”?

Would being like your mother make you “perfect” – or perhaps being like your grandmother, or a close friend?

Zachary likes to have the TV on, though he never watches it, it somehow helps him focus better so it’s on almost all the time in this house.

The other day “Judging Amy” was on, do you remember that show? Amy was being sued for custody of her daughter, Loren, by her x-husband.

Amy said something, I felt was quite profound – and while I can’t remember it exactly it was something to the effect of “No, I am not perfect, and no I would not want my daughter to grow up with someone who is – Loren has to learn that mistakes happen, parents just like everyone else make mistakes, that’s part of what makes us human. Its learning to LEARN from those mistakes that makes us better, and helps to shape who we will become as we get older.”

It seems to me that striving to be the “perfect parent” is almost as achievable as striving to swim all the way across the Atlantic Ocean. Yet, we all still seem to strive to be “perfect.”

So what do you do, when you realize that no matter what you do you’re never going to be perfect?

First, forgive yourself, you’re not the only “non perfect parent” around! Admit when you make a mistake, forgive yourself and let it go! Gosh it sounds so easy doesn’t it? Though its probably one of the hardest things we have to do as parents, heck even as people.

Second, ask for forgiveness from God! Jennifer from Secretary 2 Go, has become a great friend, in Christ, she sent me a book of revelations on forgiveness. So I picked out several of my “favorites,” got a shoe box, and decorated it. I wrote all of my favorites on the box. Now, when I need forgiveness for something, I write it down and place it inside the box. Somehow seeing the mistake, and reading some of the revelations, makes it all sink in, and brings me peace.

Third, ask your children for forgiveness. Like Amy said, children can’t learn that parents make mistakes or learn how to deal with these mistakes, unless they SEE how you work though your mistakes! So, be honest, talk to them, and remind them that your human, and that mistakes DO happen (even to parents)! In doing so you’re teaching them exactly how to work though their own mistakes, when they happen.

Fourth, learn from your mistake! You don’t want to keep making the same mistake day after day, week after week. So, when a mistake happens, take the time to learn from it! Don’t “shuffle” it to the back burner!

Lastly, remember that being perfect really is not what we, as parents, or as people really want anyway – If everything was perfect, life would be so boring! Wouldn’t it?